Insights
Mar 7, 2026
Curiosity in the Workplace: How to Ask Respectful Questions in a Multicultural Environment
We’ve all been there. Chatting away with a colleague from a different background and suddenly, pop! A question lands in your mind. Maybe it’s about their accent, religion or family traditions. You’re not trying to be rude. You’re just…curious. But then comes that moment of hesitation: “Can I ask that?”
Here’s the thing: curiosity is a beautiful thing. It’s part of how we connect and grow. But in diverse workplaces, how we ask matters just as much as what we ask.
Scenario: Good Intentions But Missed the Mark
Picture a team coffee break. Sean turns to his colleague Noor and asks with a friendly tone, “So, do you have to wear your hijab all the time?”
Sean’s tone? Light-hearted. But Noor’s response? A subtle shift in her posture, then a quick change of subject.
Sean didn’t mean harm. But the question still landed a bit sideways. Why? Because in that moment, Noor was made to feel like ‘the other’ instead of just… Noor from finance who loves iced lattes and always has the funniest memes.
These moments aren’t about villainising curiosity; they’re about fine-tuning it.
Why Framing Matters
Research highlights the importance of how we ask questions. Intercultural communication expert Stella Ting-Toomey explained that when our communication is rooted in identity awareness and mindful listening, trust grows. But when our questions accidentally ‘other’ someone, even with the best intentions, they can leave people feeling uncomfortable or exposed.
So here’s the bottom line: Intent matters; but impact matters more.
Curiosity that’s respectful, reciprocal and rooted in connection can spark real moments of understanding. But when it feels one-sided or a little too personal? It can quietly chip away at trust.
So What Can You Do?
Here are three quick checks to do a little self-inquiry before asking that burning question on your mind:
- Motivation check: Are you asking something to build a genuine connection, or just to scratch an itch of curiosity?
- Power check: Do you hold more power in this dynamic (e.g. you’re their manager, or you’re part of the dominant culture)? If so, tread with extra care.
- Social psychological research shows that power asymmetry increases the risk of perceived microaggressions (Sue et al., 2007).
- Privacy check: Would you feel comfy answering a similar question about your own identity?
Think of these checks as your cultural curiosity toolkit. They won’t stop the questions from coming up, but they can guide how you frame those questions.
But What If You Already Asked Something Awkward?
First off, don’t panic! We’re human. Curiosity can get messy. Here’s the GORM-approved response plan:
- Acknowledge it privately: A quick and sincere “Hey, I think I may have worded that question awkwardly earlier, sorry if it made you uncomfortable,” goes a long way.
- Reflect: Why did you ask that? Would you ask it differently now?
- Learn and move on: Don’t get stuck in guilt. Use the moment as compost for growth!
For Managers: Model the Mindset
If you’re in a leadership role, you set the tone. Here’s how to build a workplace culture where respectful curiosity is part of the norm:
- Use your language mindfully: Model how to ask better questions, and share when you’ve learned from missteps.
- Set clear boundaries: Make it known that no one is obliged to disclose personal information.
- Build intercultural competence: Whether it’s joining a GORM training session or creating safe spaces for dialogue, help your team level up together.
Curiosity doesn’t belong in the HR policy drawer. It belongs in the everyday fabric of team culture, and thoughtful curiosity signals care.
Be Curious with Respect!
Curiosity is a bridge, but only when rooted in respect. When we pause to reflect before speaking, we move from just learning about each other to learning with each other.
So, next time that curious question bubbles up, pause for a beat. The question you don’t ask might just show more cultural awareness than the one you do.
Ready to embed cultural diversity and intercultural competence into your organisation’s DNA? Join the waitlist now for GORM’s upcoming Unified Business Programme, a structured journey towards lasting inclusion and stronger teams ✨
GORM is an multi-award winning social enterprise on a mission to unify across differences and advance belonging for marginalised communities through intercultural media and education. Guided by evidence based methods such asBelonging Design Principles and Intercultural Competence Frameworks, GORM delivers its services to Elevate the voices of diverse communities through media, Enable Communities to tell their stories through community programme, and Equip leaders through evidence based intercultural consultancy. GORM aids in the sustainable goals of (10) reducing inequality and (16) Peace, justice and strong institutions.
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